Have a Healing Weekend

Have a Healing Weekend

This week has been difficult. I feel like my consciousness is frequently violated by horrible news, and the humanity of those who look like me is frequently being questioned. I don’t have the luxury of ignoring the news even if I wanted to, because it affects me and everyone who looks like.

I have wanted to make this space one that doesn’t not delve too much into the political climate, but to do that is to disregard my very existence. Amanda Gorman the youngest inaugural poet titled her 2020 TED Talk, Using Your Voice is a Political Choice, and she is so right. You may slump back into your chair thinking, “Really?” Yes really.

When you watch anyone with a social media presence, you’re not just looking at an individual, but you’re engaging in how that person takes up space in the world. Capturing yourself in photographs and using language is making a statement about how individuals wants others to perceive her very existence. Everything translated through pictures and words is a political statement.

Today, I am using my voice to say:

I am Renata “Bre.” I am a mother of two. I recently graduated with a BA in Psychology with a concentration in industrial/organizational psychology. I love painting, writing poetry, crocheting, knitting, reading and seeking adventure that involves nature. I am an introvert and I am passionate about humanity. I love making people around me feeling ten feet tall. I never intentionally hurt people and I am thoughtful. I am an only child, I love my mother dearly, I am a great friend and mother.

You don’t have to know all of these things about me to respect and extend to me human kindness. My very existence requires that of you.

For the black people especially who may see this post, and those who understand what we go through, I want you to take care of yourselves. Set the bar high for doing something that helps you have some inner peace and come to terms with all that is happening around us.

Get together with like minded individuals. Talk to a friend, a therapist or a family member. Engage in some serotonin boosting activities. Hug on your partner. Light some candles and put on some music that soothes your soul. Just anything that helps relieve the stress and frustration that you may be harboring.

We need to find ways to channel all that hurt in a way that brings us closer to healing our generational and collective trauma. I don’t have the answers, and like many people, I am processing myself. I just want those of us feeling this assault to take a moment to breathe and work on healing ourselves.

We will get there. Namaste.

How to Feel Unbothered by Quarantine Weight Gain

How to Feel Unbothered by Quarantine Weight Gain

So you’ve gained some pounds during the quarantine. Given that it feels like there is no end in sight to this pandemic, you have a choice. You can either obsess over it or embrace it. Here are a few tips on how to feel unbothered.

Work on loving yourself

What you think of yourself internally matters way more than simply how you look on the outside. Maintaining a great appearance is a good thing, but to base your whole identity on how you look is very detrimental. Knowing that you are more than an outer shell is crucial. Having positive adjectives—kind, smart, thoughtful, caring —add to your sense of self worth more than a number on a scale that you probably don’t own.

Show yourself some compassion

We are collectively going through this quarantine and it has been tougher on some more than others. Seeing people accomplishing workout or body goals on social media is great, but if you’re not there, show yourself the same compassion you would extend to someone else. It’s so amazing how we can be our own worst critic. Be mindful of the language that you use towards your body, and while you’re at it, throw on something sexy to remind yourself that you’ve still got it.

Spend time with friends and family

Whether it’s virtually or safely in person and in small groups, continue to nurture your healthy relationships with loved ones. Knowing your worth is important, but even the best of us sometimes forget how much value we add to the life of others. Sometimes it takes people who know us best to remind us. When you’re happy, you focus less on things like gaining five or ten pounds.

Focus on wellbeing

Last, but not least, focus on your overall wellbeing which includes psychological, emotional, spiritual, social and physical— I may be missing a few more ‘al’ words. You are a person, not a life sized doll. You are complex, and amazing and you have so much to contribute in this life. Unless you and/or your doctor feel that your weight is causing health issues, enjoy the extra softness.

You decide the next steps to take, but while you’re at it, enjoy it. You have one body and no time should be spent picking it apart. Life is hard enough already. Love yourself exactly where you are.